Beginnings
by Awesthetics
Summary: My take on a playful way for Alex and Jo to get together. I originally wrote this mid season 9 as a oneshot and now I'm continuing it.
1. Introductions

"Why can't I just stop thinking about her?" Alex asked impatiently. Ever since he had admitted to himself he had feelings for Jo, his mind was in overdrive thinking about every possibility of how it could play out. The way he saw it, he had 3 choices: Man up, tell her, and hope it worked out (unlikely); not say anything and try to be nice to her d-bag boyfriend (manageable); or just kiss her and see how she reacts. Alex quickly ruled the last one out as an impossibility. He'd had too much crazy for one lifetime to take that kind of risk. He ran his hand over his hair and rested it on the dark pillow above him.

This is weird, he decided, lying in Christina's bed talking relationship problems. Her and Mere always seemed to be doing this kind of thing, so could it really be _that bad_?

"You know, if you got together she'd probably go crazy." Christina said matter-of-factly, looping her finger around her temple. "That happens a _lot_. Especially to you" she said.

_OK_, Alex decided, _it is_ _that bad_.

"Whatever. I'm going home" Alex said. This was definitely not helping.

"So soon?" Christina questioned. She thought about it for a second. "You know, I'm pretty amazing. The power to make stupid people leave me alone." she said brilliantly.

"Don't flatter yourself, Yang. I'm on call tonight." He said walking out of the room.

"If worst comes to worst, remember: you can always fight this guy for the girl!" Christina called after him.

* * *

><p>As he was approaching the hospital for the start of his shift, Alex's beeper went off (911) and he rushed to whatever child needed his help. Dodging nurses with ease, he rounded the last corner only to see Jo and her d-bag boyfriend making out in the hallway. "Let's move" Alex said, not bothering to look Jo in the eyes.<p>

Jo loosened her grip and quickly fell in to stride behind a now agitated Alex Karev.

"I was just.. I mean, we were just…" Jo rambled.

"I don't want to hear it" Alex vehemently stated. "We've got a kid to save."

Alex walked into the OR confidently, watching the pulsing abdominal wound of the 8 year old on the table while scrubbing in. He had impaled himself on a tree, and Alex had told his parents that he would be fine. The truth was, with this kind of injury he couldn't be certain. It would take a great group of doctors working in sync to give him his life back. He thought he had that with Jo, but lately her mind had been elsewhere.

Alex noticed the scratches on Jo's arms as she was scrubbing in. "You alright?" Alex asked, genuine concern thick in his voice.

"It's nothing" Jo waved off his suspicions. "Besides, we have a live to save, don't we? Let's focus on that." Jo said a little too icily.

* * *

><p>"How would you like to take over?" Alex asked a distraught looking Jo.<p>

Jo got over what was bothering her and gracefully accepted the scalpel. Alex looked over, intently studying the gorgeous face as she worked. Right as Alex was noticing the paleness of her skin, he looked down to see blood oozing from the incision point. No time for trivial politeness, Alex grabbed a scalpel and prepared to take over.

"What did you do?" Alex demanded angrily. He quickly stepped in and all but pushed Jo to the side. "God damnit, I cannot find the source of this bleeding" Alex grunted, his hands rummaging the boy's intestines for signs of distress.

"Found it. You punctured his kidney, further damaging it. This kid is going to have to live with one kidney the rest of his life." Alex fumed. "Either pay attention or get the hell out my OR Jo.

After surgery, Jo was called into a meeting with the Chief of Sugery. Alex looked over in equal parts curiosity and remorse. Jo walked bitterly up to Alex once she was out. "It turns out that Jimmy had a diseased kidney and that was why it was so damaged. It wasn't my fault at all, so, thanks for completely humiliating me in there."

"Sorry" was all Alex replied with. Seeing that Jo was geared up for a fight, Alex dropped a hand on her shoulders sending reflexive shivers down her spine. "Look." Alex said sincerely. "I have enough crazy in my life right now. Can we just be cool again?"

Jo looked up, preparing to berate him for his mistakes, but, finding only sympathy and the patented Alex security, her anger smoldered and ebbed.

* * *

><p>Alex sat at Joe's, taking in the silence after a long day at work. So entrenched in his own thoughts, he barely noticed when Jo came. She slid down in the chair next to him dejectedly and defeated. Still, she looked up at him with a hint of a smile on her face before drowning herself in a beer quickly served by the bartender.<p>

"What are you pouting about?" Jo asked. "I'm the one that almost got fired today."

"Poor you." Alex smirked.

"Why were you so upset with me anyways?" she questioned.

"You mean besides the fact you could've cost that kid a kidney because you weren't paying attention?" Alex fired back. "You're an intern. I'm an attending." Alex stated. "I'm allowed to get mad at you. It's my job."

"I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about the fact that you ignored me the rest of the day. And yesterday."

"I'm an intern, but I'm also your friend. Look, when you freaked out at me professionally, I could understand. I'm an intern, you're a resident. That's what happens." Jo said. "But you are _not_ allowed to ignore me the rest of the day. You are not allowed to get mad at me because I am kissing my boyfriend, or because you are having a bad day. That stuff is personal. That stuff you can't hate me over."

"I know." Alex said nonchalantly.

It annoyed Jo to no end that she was fuming while he was sitting there nonchalantly without a sound, probably laughing at her internally.

"Eugh." Jo grunted. "You're such a douche."

"More of a douche than your d-bag boyfriend?" Alex questioned. He meant it as a joke, but there was an indescribable truth in the tone underneath.

Jo paused for a second to contemplate her answer.

"Yes." she decided.

Alex soothed his pain with another drink and looked away with an overly loud "hmmpphh." To his surprise, Jo went on. She usually wasn't the 'talking about her feelings' kind of girl.

"You're more of a douche in that you are constantly changing your opinion of me." Jo concluded outwardly. "At least with Jason I know where I stand."

"He cares about me. I know you don't see it, but he really does." Jo said with a smile. "I know you care about me too, but it feels different, you know? Like one day you're here and things are great and then, for whatever reason, you're refusing to talk to me and are never around. I feel like you're hiding something from me. Something really big."

As Jo was talking she realised Alex would never answer. He was too much of a guy to talk about his feelings.

"I just don't get it. I don't understand what_ possible_ reason you would have for being so all over the place. I mean, do you want to hang out and grab drinks more often? Are you mad because I spend so much time with my boyfriend? Do you think I'm going to make a terrible surgeon? What are you hiding?"

Alex was tempted, naturally, to try and stop her before she reached the conclusion he made a long time ago. For some reason, he just couldn't. Maybe he just didn't want to avoid it anymore.

"I mean, the only _possible _reason for you to be acting so weird is if you either like me, or you have a really big secret." Jo looked over at Alex suspiciously. "Do you? Have a big secret?"

Alex shrugged.

"What is it? Married? Alien? Are you some serial killer or something?" Jo raised her eyebrows questioningly. "Do you hate puppies?" She laughed.

"It's not like that." Alex sighed.

"Then you obviously have some sort of feelings for me." Jo stated. She meant it jokingly, like was an impossible statement. After an immeasurable unit of time, she looked over at Alex, her curious eyes searching his. "You don't, do you?"

Something in his eyes made it click; Jo knew the impossible truth. That didn't mean she believed it.

Jo laughed. "You, having feelings for me?" Jo roared with laughter. "Don't get me wrong, you're cute and all - I mean when I first saw you, but now I just… I mean seriously." Jo laughed again. "Imagine if we-"

Alex, finally fed up with Jo's rambling, turned and leaned in, effectively stopping whatever joke she was about to make. Jo couldn't help holding her breath as his hand reached to pull her closer to him. Before she had any time to make a decision, Alex leaned in, his lips meeting hers in a moment of pure passion, effectively ending the conversation. Jo knew from the inexplicable tug in her heart that what she was getting herself into trouble, but couldn't find it within herself to stop. His lips were too soft, the moment too tender; there was no going back now. Not after she felt this.

"He finally did it." Meredith looked smug as she looked over and saw Alex and Jo making out in the corner.


	2. Second Thoughts

When Alex woke, he found himself in a familiar his familiar bed in a familiar situation. With a gorgeous girl in it. His eyes quickly adjusted to the lazy morning sunlight drifting through his bedroom curtains. He lowered his head, turning his attention back to the brunette in his bed. He faced her and lifted his hand to her face, slowly, silently, as if she were an animal in the wilderness that could be spooked by the tiniest movement. He brushed the hair tangled in her face aside and took the opportunity to lay a gentle kiss on her forehead.

It was a familiar gesture with an unfamiliar response. It was like the world, so ordinarily filled with noise, had been silenced, and there was nothing in the world that existed but this moment. Millions of choices and decisions across space and time that led up to this single moment. This girl, who had occupied the thoughts and dreams of Alex for weeks was in his bed. Conquered.

But conquered was a word for the Alex of the past. This was more. He was more.

He wanted more.

Alex closed his eyes and dreamed of the future.

.

When he woke again, Jo was looking up at him with her beautiful brown eyes, studying him the way he had been studying her. Alex had no idea how long she had been doing this for. He had to admit – it was a little creepy. He wondered idly if she was thinking the same as him - whether or not this was really real.

"Hey handsome." Jo smiled her brilliant smile and Alex could've sworn the room got brighter. Her hands rested on his chest and she reached up for a good morning kiss.

"This uhhh…" Jo paused. "This is real, right?"

Alex reached up his hand, softly cupping Jo's cheek and giving her a slow, sweet kiss.

"Yes." He replied, capturing her eyes with his, and then resumed his old position.

"Wow." That was all Jo had to respond with. Alex sent an amused smirk.

"Wow." Jo said again, and Alex could sense the immediate change in tone. This one wasn't good.

Jo sat up, grabbing extra clothes and wielding them like a shield. This 'wow' definitely wasn't good.

"I cheated on my boyfriend." Jo panicked. "I'm a cheater."

"Ah, he'll get over it" Alex smirked devilishly, still lying on the bed.

"No." Jo chastised, her finger pointing towards him like one would chastise a puppy that had peed on the carpet.

"No. You do not get to be fake about this right now. I just cheated on my boyfriend with my boss. With my boss's boss. I cheated on a resident with an attending. I cheated on my boss with my boss's boss." Jo's head was spinning. She was starting to feel nauseous.

"No." Alex comforted. "You had a fun night with a great guy who l-"

"NO." Jo interrupted. "No I- I cheated. And I am NOT a cheater."

Alex took a second to be thankful that Jo didn't seem to hear what Alex almost said.

"I'm a terrible person." Jo said, collecting her clothes and sneaking them on underneath the covers she was still wearing. "I'm a terrible person and I have to go."

"No you're not." Alex repeated although Jo didn't seem to be listening. He tried to get her eye contact but failed. Alex figured he might as well go for it anyways. Nothing to lose and all. "You're awesome." Alex paused. "Amazing. Perfect."

Jo was fully dressed now and on her way out the door, but those words stopped her dead in her tracks. She turned around slowly and faced a shirtless Alex.

"Thank you." Jo smiled, getting a little distracted by Alex's eyes. Alex had gotten changed remarkably fast and was now beside her. Watching yet another girl leave. When will this stop, Alex wondered.

"I mean it." Jo stated. "Last night was…" Jo trailed off.

"Horrible?" Alex finished. "Terrible? Inappropriate?"

"Good." Jo said with a smile. "But I can't do," Jo gestured to Alex "this." "Not right now."

Jo turned the door handle and was started walking out the door when Alex's hand stopped her. And then his lips. He had pulled her back and in her disoriented state he managed to land a heavy kiss on the girl of his dreams. Jo's hands clutched at his shirt and only let go when their lips finally parted and her lungs reached for air.

"Well when you can do this," Alex murmured between soft kisses. "You know where I'll be."

And then he let her go.


	3. Choosing sides

Jo rushed out of Alex's apartment, her head and heart a dizzy mess. Less than 10 minutes ago, she had been staring up at the man she had just spent the night with, and now she standing outside his house, crying. _It didn't seem to get any easier_, Jo thought, _to grow up_. She had gotten through childhood as a foster kid, and she had lived a good life in spite of it. She had achieved in spite of it. _Or maybe because if it_ Jo pondered. It was her rough childhood that had forced her to mature prematurely. She couldn't waste her time shopping and worrying about boys like some people. She was on her own. But with all the time she spent putting herself through college med school with a high enough grade to get her in this program, she hadn't the time to mature emotionally. Relationship wise, she had only ever learned to run. _High school with scalpels_ she thought.

Despite the pouring rain - it was really starting to come down – she managed to grab a taxi and got home before noon.

Jo took a minute to think – really think – about her choices. Because something in her heart told her that Jason wouldn't take the breakup very well. During one of the nights she stayed over with him, laying in his bed, he had shared, in confidence of course, his anger issues. Jo got the idea from him that his anger got pretty bad sometimes.

But that was no excuse. She knew she had to pick the one she thought made her the best person – and that definitely was not Jason. Given the choice, Jo would pick Alex any day. And yet she had ran. In her excuse, it was the right thing to do. But those words, the _right thing to do,_ hadn't meant much in her life. It was always just what she needed to do to survive.

Jo decided right then and there that she was going to end things with Jason and tell Alex as soon as possible. She wasn't quite sure what had made her decision so easy, when she had been apprehensive about it the whole ride home. Maybe it was thinking about Alex's hands. Or lips. Maybe it was her suddenly, unconsciously, realising that her and Jason had too many issues between them to have a future, and that their constant fighting would only bring them more pain - the kind that left one of them broken and battered and desperate to recover - and to try and ignore that and stay together was like an addict with his drug, chasing the thing that would destroy them. Or maybe it was because she thought Alex and her had a chance at something great. So Jo made up her mind without a second thought and dialled Jason's number, planning on telling him the classic "we need to talk."

She decided not to think about Jason's anger issues. They weren't her problem, after all.

_I'll survive this._ Jo thought.

She wasn't so sure that was true.

* * *

><p>When all was said and done after Jo's talk with her now ex-boyfriend, Jo concluded that Jason might not have an anger problem after all. Either that or he never really cared about Jo in the first place. Because he took the news surprisingly well. He hadn't yelled or screamed when Jo told him she didn't feel like she used to anymore. He had been calm. Silent. He listened as Jo rambled on about people changing and the significance of life. He had nodded his head in the tiniest of gestures when Jo asked if he could understand. He accepted without argument when Jo told him he wasn't good for her. <em>They weren't good for each other<em>, she said,_ and their constant fighting surely wasn't good for her._

But there was a different reason Jason hadn't said a word in rebuttal. And it wasn't a lack of anger issues. He was a lot of things, but Jason knew he wasn't a liar. When he told Jo he struggled with anger, he was telling the truth. He had no reason to hide the truth. Now he did.

Jo never told Jason there was someone else, but Jason knew there was - someone who's presence nullified all the bullshit lines Jo was feeding him. Jason knew what she was really saying. He might be smart and good looking, but he wasn't stupid. No, Jason knew exactly what had happened.

She had fallen for that jackass Karev.

Jason wasn't very happy about that.

**A/N: My chapters are pretty short, I know. There's a reason for it.**


	4. You should be with me

Jo spent the afternoon thinking about Alex. Through every meeting, every patient, there was one common thread of thought that ran throughout her mind - him. She thought of his lips, his hands, his smile. She thought of the future she could have. Would have.

It wasn't too long ago that she imagined this feeling that followed her throughout the afternoon was something she would never feel again. It wasn't too long ago she thought she was too afraid to love.

Jo finally arrived home after a long, terribly long, unfocused day of internship. It had been Alex's day off, otherwise she would've told him everything already. Jo stepped through her doorstep and let her feet finally slip out of the prison-like shoes she had worn for countless hours. What happened next made her heart skip a beat.

Alex was standing in the middle of her tiny apartment, looking hella hot in a simple black t shirt and jeans that were soaked from the rain. Before Jo had a chance to tell Alex how she felt, she was interrupted when Alex quietly spoke, so quietly that Jo strained to hear it among the downpour on her roof.

"I was wrong." His voiced cracked when he said those three words. Not in a teenage boy going through puberty kind of voice crack, but the kind of way that happens when the words carry so much emotion they break in half from the overwhelming weight of it all.

All was silent except the ever present clang of rain on Jo's roof. Jo opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. Alex, seeing that Jo wasn't speaking and assuming it meant she wasn't interested, took the opportunity to keep going. He had to change her mind. There was something there that kept telling her they were supposed to be together.

"I shouldn't have let you go." Alex said, a lot louder, despite the fact that Jo was now closer than she was before. "I mean, I understand why you had to go. You had to figure things out. But I don't, Jo. I want to be with you."

Jo felt the familiar urge to stop him, to run. To get out of this before she messed it all up. It was a primal instinct that took hold in her mind, but it was her heart that had the power this time. She had to stay. She wanted to stay. She stepped closer, and now they were standing together, her face not 2 feet from his, looking eachother in the eyes and finally hearing the words both of them had been thinking about all afternoon.

"I know it's not fair. It's not fair of me to be saying this. But I have to, because it's true. I can't send you off. I can't watch you leave when I would give anything to have you stay. And I cant" Alex said "Watch you be with him because you haven't figured out yet that he's not good for you.

"You shouldn't be with Jason, you should be with me. And I know it's not that easy, but it is. Because I know in my heart that we are supposed to be together. That there's something here. And I have to see where it goes because it's killing me to be away from you, even for a day. And I can't bear not being with you any longer."

They say time is relative. That it speeds up and slows down. Those two seconds after Alex finished his monologue and waited for a response from Jo were the longest of his life. Alex had lay his heart on the line, something he had rarely ever done before. Jo's response could break him. It would be so easy.

But she didn't.

She didn't speak either. She didn't tell Alex that she felt all those things too. But that was okay with Alex. He always thought actions spoke louder than words anyways.

Jo leaned in, not having to go very far because in Alex's heated speech they kept unconsciously moving closer to eachother. Eyelids drooped and hearts raced. Their lips connected in a searing kiss and Jo snaked her hands around to the back of Alex's neck, pulling him impossibly closer.


End file.
